Tag Archives: poetry

Indescribable

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If it were only possible,
I would put it in a way,
A concise, simple way,
Then you'd understand.
Then you'd know the fear,
Of drowning with no water,
When no droplets are present.
Of feeling the air, empty,
Leave your lungs,
With no replacement breath.
Then you'd see,
That black shroud of an umbrella,
I carry around with me.
It doesn't close, won't or can't.
I'm always under its covers.
Then you'd notice it,
When the sun shines through,
I reach for it, try to grab it.
But also how I hurt,
When I can't take any with me.
How terrible it is to see joy,
Knowing how good it feels,
But no feeling it.

Then you'd feel the terror,
The pure horror of loneliness.
The madness it ensues,
The longing it forms inside.
But also the pain it causes,
When the mind turns to itself,
Filled only with hate,
Wishing for pain. Then the guilt,
Not for sin, for selfishness.
Knowing others would be better
At living this life than you,
And yet, wanting so badly,
Not to have it anymore.

Cream White

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Cream white skin,
They possessed,
Innocence, purity, trust,
Why must children possess
Everything you desire?
They are perfection, perfection,
Yet you seek to destroy them.

When they sleep,
Only dreams should grace them,
Not fear, not torment,
Just dreams,
Of new bikes, toys, happiness.

They are perfect,
Not worth giving any pain,
Perfect, beautiful,
They don't deserve it.

Yet you hurt them,
destroy their innocence,
Burn their purity,
Torture the child,
Kill their absolution.

They are beautiful,
Gorgeous, children,
Even after you're pain.
And no-one could stop it.
You hurt them.
You destroy their person-hood,
Their lives
And no-one can give that back.
NO ONE

Time to be Fixed

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A delay is a delay,
But a delay is not an end.
An end is an end,
But an end is not a delay.

A delay can progress,
An end is complete,
The mind can progress,
And life is complete.

It's time to stop the delay,
Allow the mind to progress.
It's time to end the struggle,
Allow my life to feel complete.

It's time to fix the delay,
It's time to be fixed.

Time to Stop Talking

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Sometimes I need to,
Sometimes I can't say,
All of the most important things.
But I think that now,
It's time to stop talking.
I need not to run my mouth,
I need not to say all those things,
Because soon,
You'll start to hate me,
If you don't already,
And if you do already,
That's justified
But I think that now,
It's time to stop talking.

Tell Me

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You listen,
Do words make sense?
Does it put you at ease?
Do you enjoy it?
Whose pain are you treating?
Do you hurt any less?
Does it help?
Is your mind not burning?
Does your head not spin?
Do you need confessions?
Does it make you thrive?
I need to know,
Does that keep you alive?
Would you share all your secrets?
Or at least tell me?
Or would you just listen?
Listen to my pain, and add it to yours?
Or maybe you don't?
Are you really listening?
Do you realise I'm talking?
Do you hear those painful things?
Do you hear what she is saying?
Do you realise she's broken?
Do you see she's shattered?
Are your eyes not open?
Can't you tell it's deeper?
That something's missing?
A meaning behind pain?
Or maybe not.

Don’t Hate Me

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My Darling,
          Please don't hate me,
          Blame my mind, not me,
          I want life, please,
          My emotions don't understand.

My Love,
          Don't listen to the past,
          I know I nearly broke the promise,
          But not this time.
          I won't break the skin.

My Darling,
          As empty as I feel,
          I won't, I couldn't, I can't,
          No matter how much,
          I want to see you again.

My Love,
          It dances in my mind,
          Now and again. But no!
          Not a blade, or a pill,
          Not a jump, or a rope.

My Darling,
          I won't leave here early,
          I'll let you collect me,
          When my time is right,
          To return to your arms.

My Love,
          But I want to so badly,
          Please don't hate me,
          It's just a desire,
          I'll fend it off.

My Darling,
          I won't do it,
          I'll keep the promise,
          I'll wait.
          Don't hate me.

The Happy Slap and the Freight Train

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It was meant to be breakfast,
To kill the hangover, fix us up.
Then the happy slap came,
A worry, concern, conversed,
Inquired, checked, asked,
He told me you were low,
Images of the ground rising,
Swallowing you whole,
Appeared in my mind.
Common, but surprising.
I know the feeling all too well.

The freight train hit.
Your pain, in all its mental manifestations,
Dreams, longing for more,
For a physical affliction.
An emptiness formed inside me,
Guilt encapsulated me, held me,
That moment, I heard enough,
The detonator had been pulled,
You are too important,
Too vital to this world.

It Had to be Said

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It had to be said,
No more lies, or stories,
No more running away.
It just had to be said.
Or it never would,
The explosion would have killed,
Crucified, murdered, burned,
The last aspects of ourselves.

It had to be said,
No more pretending,
No more faking everything,
It had to be said.
Or we'd never know.
If we'd have been free,
To fell, to love, to cherish,
Anything ever again.

It had to be said,
No more secrets,
No more twisting the truth,
It had to be said.
Or I would have been dragged.
Pulled away from me,
The remnants left behind,
contorted and burned.

It had to be said,
No more sleepless nights,
No more pointless arguments,
It had to be said.
Or I will be the guilty party.
I will be the one who lied,
I'd have been the one who hurt,
Who burned everything in your eyes.

It had to be said,
No more silence, or quiet,
No more deceit.
It. Had. To. Be. Said.
Or I'd be someone I can't be.
I'd want what I can't have,
I'd love what isn't mine,
But not what is.

It had to be said,
No more tears, They'll dry,
No more hating, hurting.
It had to be said.